take the time.

I've been thinking about children's books this past week, ones that have influenced me greatly...ones that have shaped the way I view life as I grow older. The Velveteen Rabbit stood out to me most. What a beautiful book. The concepts contained within that tiny book can bring a person to tears. The whole idea of "becoming real" and even the way it edges the idea of "beauty" another thing i have wreslted against considerably.


"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in your joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

That there ties in with a song from Aireline that I like "When Pianos Fall"

"We're all breakable and we're all dangerous when we're broken.
I promise I'll try not to break you if you promise not to break me back"

I guess it makes me think of how i approach realationships...with a closed fist. It shocks me to think of how many people I consider myself "close" with that have no idea who i really am. I suppose it would help if I knew the answer myself, but honestly Ive been so afraid of being broken until now. People arent china dolls...we were made to withstand more than our share of falls.
"Its painful but in pain - i will find beauty" 12.28.04